Forget Your Weaknesses. Develop Your Strengths.

Note: This article appeared on my old website As it most definitely applies to the theme of this blog, I’ve re-published it. Enjoy.

The idea that we should turn our weaknesses into our strengths is a common theme in the self-help community. There are countless books and blogs that tell us to focus on the areas in our life where we could do better and work to systematically improve upon these weaknesses so that they become our strengths.

This is a good idea, but it’s a good idea that has sadly been taken to its logical extreme. Because we have limited our focus to our weaknesses, we forget to recognize our natural abilities and talents. We adopt a kind of tunnel vision, seeing our lives a as checklist of things we need to fix.

If this philosophy could be summed up in one sentence, it would be this:

Determine what you’re bad at, and become less bad at it.

This isn’t the worst philosophy in the world, and it can help you get results to a point. I know that it has certainly worked for me. One of the weaknesses that I had worked to overcome was my shyness and introversion. When I was a kid, I used to be so shy that picking up the phone to call a store about whether they had or didn’t have a particular item in stock made me nervous. Eventually, through some effort, I overcame this weakness. Not only did I not have trouble picking up the phone, but I had grown to love cold-calling. In fact, when I became a corporate recruiter, I was making an average of 80 to 100 calls a day to complete strangers. I wasn’t calling them about store inventories either, but trying to persuade them to meet me at my office to discuss an opportunity in a different company. These calls were often done in Japanese, which is my second language.

Not only did I overcome shyness, but I became a better salesman (recruiting is basically sales). In my first year my ranking out of 100 recruiters in the company was near the bottom. By reading many books on sales and the art of persuasion and applying the techniques from these books in my daily work, I grew from being a terrible recruiter to an above average recruiter. My numbers proved it. I went from near the bottom rung to number 20 or so in the rankings.

As the above two examples show, focusing on overcoming weaknesses does help, but it has its limitations. Nothing made this more clear to me when a 27-year-old rookie, who had joined a year before I did, became the top recruiter in our whole company. He had astounding numbers and less experience than the veterans who had been there for years.

That consultant had a gift. He was a born salesman. He was naturally good at what he did and the more he did it, the better he got. Because I had subscribed to the “weaknesses into strengths” paradigm, I tried to convince myself if I worked hard enough, I would be able to reach his level. Over time, the fact that I had trouble getting even close to his level was a source of real frustration for me.

Because I was hung up on the fact that this rookie had more natural talent than me, I failed to acknowledge my own unique talents, which, although they may not help me become the top recruiter at a headhunting firm, could definitely help me become a leader in other arenas.

It wasn’t until I quit my job to work for myself that my perspective started to change. As I embarked on a new career path and devoted myself to doing what I love, I suddenly realized that, despite my lack of experience, things came much easier to me. My job was no longer a daily struggle with my weaknesses. Rather, I involved myself in work that made the best use of my strengths. Gradually, I moved away from the weaknesses-to-strengths paradigm and began to follow an entirely different philosophy:

Determine what you’re good at, and get better at it.

If you focus on turning your weaknesses into strengths, you’ll achieve a level of competency, maybe even become above average, but odds are you’ll never be the best.  Being the best requires both talent and hard work. If you’re missing one of those ingredients, above average is as far as you’re going to get. If you know you don’t have talent in a certain area, stop pushing yourself in the hopes that you can manufacture it through sheer effort. Instead, focus on the areas where you do have talent, and work to develop them.  If you develop your strengths first, your weaknesses will have a tendency to take care of themselves.

One book that helped crystallize the idea of “strengths first” for me was StrengthsFinder 2.0, by Tom Rath. The book is essentially an index of the 34 strengths that you can work to develop over the course of your life. Not only are the strengths well-described, but the book also provides action steps that you can take to develop them. In order to determine which of the 34 strengths are your top five strengths, you take an online test that requires a special access code that comes with every book.

Being the personality test addict that I am, I paid my $13.47 plus shipping and handling for the book, tore open the envelope with my super-secret access code and went online to take the test. My top 5 strengths were as follows:

  • Intellection – Having a need for mental activity, whether it be solving a problem, developing ideas, or philosophical reflection.
  • Ideation – Being fascinated by ideas and new perspectives. Viewing phenomena from new and different angles.
  • Futuristic – The ability to have a clear, detailed vision of what the future might hold.
  • Connectedness – Understanding that we, all of us, are a part of something bigger. Being aware of the subtle forces and patterns which govern all things.
  • Learner – Having a love of learning.

I wasn’t particularly surprised by my results, other very good personality tests I had taken had basically informed me of my strengths (and weaknesses) in a similar way. What was different was how the StrengthsFinder book encouraged me to develop my strengths.  The book stressed that although these were my natural talents, I had to work to develop them or they would deteriorate.

Thinking back to my career as a recruiter, I realized how true that was. In the effort to eliminate my weaknesses, I had neglected many of my natural strengths, almost to the point of making them weaknesses. Because I was too busy making calls and answering emails, I gave myself little time to think things through, thus neglecting my abilities of intellection. Because I was so busy gobbling up other people’s ideas about how things should be done, I had spent little time developing my own ideas, thus neglecting my abilities of ideation. Because I didn’t allow myself see past my sales figures for the next fiscal quarter, I failed to think about the future–the long term consequences of my actions and inactions. I was so preoccupied by narrow concerns that I failed to tap into my ability to see the connections between things. Finally, because I let myself work 50 to 60 hour weeks and partied all night on the weekends to blow off steam, I spent very little time learning anything new.

I realize now that I could have worked to develop my strengths even as a recruiter, but because the job was such a mismatch for me, it made me more aware of the weaknesses I had to improve upon than the strengths I could capitalize upon. Now, because I’ve decided to work for myself I find myself gravitating toward business opportunities that take advantage of my strengths rather than making me aware of my weaknesses. It’s amazing what change in perspective can do.

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  • Shirokuma

    I get that, especially the part about not focusing on weaknesses.

    Is it actually possible for most people though? Like especially for people who do not have the time for introspection that the newly laid off or unemployable (like me) have. A lot of people are not in the situation that I am in where they can blow off the idea of getting another job “just to pay the bills” and follow something completely different that it seems they actually have a talent for. A lot of people are stuck by circumstances: kids, spouse, bills, mortgage etc. The time to understand oneself is the most important and perhaps the toughest thing.

  • Kenji

    Glad to see you here, Shirokuma.

    I must admit that I count myself among the one of the lucky ones who don’t have a lot of external attachments to limit my freedom. Although I certainly can’t speak from experience, I have known of others who have managed to make time for introspection despite all of their commitments. It’s all a matter of just wanting it bad enough.

    This can often mean making short term sacrifices in the pursuit of long-term goals. Not being able to meet your short-term responsibilities can be uncomfortable but smothering your own talents and passions in pursuit of a paycheck can be excruciating.

  • bob

    Most people strike a balance between doing what they want to and doing what they have to. Neglecting either is shortsighted and unrealistic.

  • Kenji

    There are very few things in life that we actually have to do. Most of the things we think we have to do are based on our own prejudices and conditioning. What really matters is doing what we have to do in order to do what we want to do and working to integrate the two.

  • bob

    Most people don’t know what they want.

  • Kenji

    That’s very true. It’s unfortunate too because gaining clarity about what you want can be one of the best things you can do for yourself.

  • Hey Kenji,

    I can see why you republished this post. It was great! I think if we accept our weaknesses, then and only then we can become better at it. Once we accept it, then we can look for ways to better it. Sometimes we pretend we have no weaknesses but that only makes us weaker.

  • Kenji



    I agree, to deny our weaknesses is to halt our growth. I think it’s important to work on our weaknesses so they aren’t debilitating, but focusing on our strengths is much more productive and worthwhile.

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  • Bo Carrington

    I am late coming to the party on this but wanted to say that the last paragraph that you penned says what few others are willing to say when it comes to strengths based development.

    While I agree wholeheartedly with the practice, there has to be a dose of reality mixed in that says, if your weaknesses are getting in the way of you being successful in the role you are in, you have two options: work on your weaknesses and mitigate their impact; OR find a job that fits!

  • Mike Pro

    I get it. There was once an author that said virtually the same thing. I heard it on a tape from Nightingale Conant and the name of the tape was the Uncommon Leader. He said that you should take the pros and cons of someone and develop the pros and place an x on the cons. Doing what they are good at will be the best direction for them to pursue.
    Dr. Mike Pro

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  • I think if we can learn to delegate our weaknesses so that we can better focus on and develop our strengths, we will find ourselves spending more quality time and energy on what we are really passionate about and find an corresponding greater degree of success and significance in our lives.

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  • Natthanai Kim Pitakuldilok

    Inspiring story. I was looking for a story to share during my Strengths Finder lecture and I came across your blog! Thanks for sharing.

    PS: I also share two common themes with you, Connectedness and Learner! 🙂
    PS2: I am also a vipassana meditation practitioner. I learned from the master S.N.Goenka too. How nice!

  • Helen Jones

    Great write up! If only all people knows how to transform their weaknesses into strengths, then they could use it to help themselves improve. This reminds me of my favorite motivational speaker named Moustafa Hamwi – the passion guy. You should check out his Passion Sundays newsletter for posts like this. Thanks!