Two Conversations with Self-doubt

Just the other day…

Self-doubt: You gotta stop working on this web application and get a real job. You have absolutely no training whatsoever in computer science. How can you possibly create a fully functioning web app?
Me: Well, I know I’m new to programming, but everyone has to start learning somewhere. I think I’ve learned a lot in the past couple of months.
Self-doubt: And your idea, it’s so…out there.  You must be mad to think it’ll actually work.
Me: I have no idea that it will, but I’ve got to try.
Self-doubt: With all the smart people out there in the world, why hasn’t anyone come up with this idea before you? They must have at some time. Because no one has succeeded in implementing an idea like yours it must mean it’s not possible.
Me: Well…it COULD be possible. Maybe those other people didn’t try hard enough.
Self-doubt: And what’s more, someone might actually succeed in creating this very same web app just before you launch it. What are you going to do then huh? You just wasted months when you could have been hunting for a job.
Me: Uh…
Self-doubt: So start sending out your damn resume!

*Short pause*

Me: Okay, I admit. You’ve done a pretty good job scaring me to death, but I can’t give up now. I have to see this through. I’ve sacrificed too much time and effort not to. Goodbye.
Self-doubt: Hey, what happened to you? I always used to win these arguments.
Me: I used to have a job then.
Self-doubt: Oh, right.

The same conversation when I had a job

Me: I’ve got a great business idea! All I need to do is to put forth a little effort, and I can get it rolling!
Self-doubt: Are you kidding? Your revenue is low this quarter. You have to be 100% focused on closing some deals or you’ll lose your job! Quit daydreaming and get back to work!
Me: Apologies sir, right away sir!

Everyone has conversations with self-doubt. The question is, which one are you having?

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